-
Why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor when you can't drink and
drive ?
-
If love is blind, why is
lingerie so popular?
-
Why do banks charge you a
"non-sufficient funds fee" on money they already know you
don't have?
-
Why do you press harder on
the remote control when you know the battery is already dead?
-
What does Geronimo scream
when dropping out of airplane ?
-
If your driving at the speed
of light and turn on your headlights what happens ?
-
Do vegetarians eat animal
crackers ?
-
If vegetarians eat vegetables,
what do humanitarians eat ?
-
If people from Poland are called Poles, why aren't people from Holland called Holes?
-
Why do we say something is out of whack? What's a whack?
-
Why do croutons come in airtight packages? It's just stale bread to begin with.
-
When cheese gets its picture taken, what does it say?
-
Why is a person
who plays the piano called a pianist, but a person who drives a racecar not called a racist?
-
Why are a wise man and a wise guy opposites?
-
Do you realize that in two days, tomorrow will be yesterday!
-
Why isn't the number 11 pronounced onety one?
-
"I am" is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that "I do" is the longest sentence?
-
Why do we put suits in a garment
bag and put garments in a suitcase?
-
If quizes are
quizicle, what are tests?
-
Thanks
to Lorena
-
Is it O.K. to use the AM
radio after noon?
-
If you throw a cat out of the
car window, 
does
it become kitty litter?
-
If quiters never win and
winners never quit, what fool came up with"quit while you're
ahead"?
-
What do chickens think we
taste like?
-
What do people in China call
their good plates?
-
What do you call a male
ladybug?
-
Before they invented drawing
boards what did they go back to?
-
Does the reverse side have a
reverse side?
-
I thought about mothers and
how they feed their babies with little tray spoons and forks, so Now I
wonder what Chinese women use.........toothpicks?
-
When dog food is new and
improved tasting, who tests it?
-
Why do they sterilize the needle for
lethal injections?
-
Why doesn't glue stick to the inside
of the bottle?
-
Why is a bra singular and panties
plural?
-
If a firefighter
fights fire and a crime fighter fights crime, what does a freedom fighter
fight?
-
Why are they called apartments when
they are all stuck together?
-
If flyin is so safe. wht do they call
the airport the terminal?
-
If a 
cow
laughs hard, does milk come out its nose? Thanks
to: sharkattack
-
If 7-11's are open 24hrs a day, 365 days a year, why are there locks on the door?
Thanks to; RamDodge4X4Life
-
Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice" ?
-
Why is it that rain drops but snow falls ?
-
Why is it that when you're driving and looking for an address, you turn
down the volume on the radio ?
-
Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid
made with real lemons ?
-
Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker ?
-
Why is the third hand on the watch called second hand ?
-
Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food ?
-
Why can't they make the whole plane out of the same substance as that little indestructible "black box" ?
-
Does a clean house indicate
that there is a broken computer in it?
-
Why is it that no matter what
color of bubble bath you use the
bubbles are always white?
-
Is there ever a day when
mattresses are NOT on sale?
-
On electric toasters, why do
they engrave the message 'one slice'?
How many pieces of bread do they think people are really gonna
try to
stuff
in that slot?
-
Why do people keep running
over a string a dozen times with their
vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down
to give their vacuum one more chance?
-
Why is it that no plastic
garbage bag will open from the end you
first try?
-
How do those dead bugs get
into closed light fixtures?
-
Considering all the lint you
get in your dryer, if you kept drying
your clothes would they eventually just disappear?
-
When we are in the
supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a
shopping cart then apologizes for doing so, why do we say 'Its all
right'? It
isn't all right, so why don't we say, 'That hurt, you stupid
idiot'?
-
Why is it that when you're
walking up the stairs and you get to the top
you always think there's still one more step?
-
Why is it that whenever you
attempt to catch something that's
falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over?
-
In winter, why do we try to
keep the house as warm as it was in
summer when we complained about the heat?
-
Why do women always ask
questions that have no right answers?
-
Why do old men wear their
pants higher than younger men?
-
If diamonds are a girl's best
friend and a dog is man's best friend,
who really is the dumber sex?
-
Why is it that men can react
to broken bones as 'just a sprain' and
deep wounds as 'just a scratch', but when they get the sniffles
they
are deathly ill?
-
How come we never hear any
father-in-law jokes?
-
Why does the sun lighten your
hair, but darken your skin?
-
Why is it that doctors call
what they do "practice"?
-
Why is lemonade made with
artificial flavor and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?
-
Why is the man who invests
all your money called a broker?
-
Why didn't Noah swat those
two mosquitoes?
-
Why do they sterilize the
needle for lethal injections?
-
Why are they called
apartments when they are all stuck together?
-
Why do you call a building
a building? If its already built, it should be called a built
-
Why
is
it
that
you
always
get
white
suds
no
matter
what
color
soap
you
use?thanks
to
angietellis
-
If
you
have
a
headache
and
you
take
a
pain
killer,
how
does
the
tablet
know
what
part
of
the
body
is
hurting?
-
thanks
to
angietellis
-
If
a
farmer
is
out
in
the
field
SOWING
his
crops
and
his
wife
is
indoors
SEWING
his
shirts,
what
are
they
both
doing?
thanks
to
angietellis
